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Clingy: the dirtiest, most foul word in the English language. Whether we're talking about static cling from the dryer, clinging to something for dear life or, God forbid, a clingy girl, there is no positive connotation associated with the word "cling."
The most offensive form of this word is in reference to women. When a girl is referred to as "clingy," there are horrific consequences. Some girls will boil over with estrogen and explode with anger while other women curl inside themselves, writhing in the agony of their abused self-esteem. Nothing positive can come out of calling a girl clingy (unless you never want to speak to her again, or you wish to prematurely expose the crazy).
Sure, there are many more derogatory and demeaning words out there to describe women, but clingy takes the cake. It calls upon all of a woman's insecurities.
Now, don't confuse "clingy" with "needy." Needy is a defensible accusation. A confident girl can dismiss this supposed insult by declaring that rather than being "needy," she simply has desires her beau obviously cannot satisfy — thus questioning the inadequacies of the accuser.
For guys, think about when a girl calls you a "creep" or "creepy" or a "creeper." It's the equivalent to clingy, an instant warning to get away and stay away.
But what is it that qualifies a girl as clingy? Well, fortunately I conducted an extremely official survey and constructed a list of the top five things that lead to this debilitating stigma.
No. 1: Texting a guy like he has a personal Twitter account with you. He doesn't care what you ate for breakfast, when you're going to the bathroom or your exact schedule for the week.
No. 2: Facebook stalking. Commenting on his wall repeatedly and clicking "like" every time he updates his status is a sure sign you're far too interested in his personal life.
No. 3: Bombarding his friends with questions whenever you see him talking to another girl. Note: Guys talk just as much as girls. He will find out you're inquiring about his every move behind his back.
No. 4: Knowing what he's doing for the day before he tells you what he's doing. Whether you find out through Facebook, his friends or an anonymous source, questioning a guy about his plans before he tells you is a dead giveaway you spend too much time tracking him.
No. 5: Searching through phones/Facebook inboxes/e-mails. Just don't do it.
It's obviously nice to know what your prospective fling is up to and what exactly he is thinking about the relationship status, but to avoid the love-leech label, keep your curiosity contained and leave the cling in the dryer.
Medill junior Jill Mahen can be reached at j-mahen@northwestern.edu.
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Then again, so is Jill.