Overheard at Northwestern

“Everyone knows what boobies are, right?” a girl asked enthusiastically a few days ago in my 300-level English course on literature and the environment. Having zoned out to re-enter the conversation just at this moment, I looked around me. I expected to share my look of confusion and shock with the rest of the classroom. A few people nodded seriously, and the rest of the faces remained impassive.

Were we really having this conversation? Had I missed something? When did our discussion of Roosevelt’s hunting journals and ridiculous elk hunting routine disintegrate into a conversation of female anatomy?

Eventually, I caught on. The class was discussing wildlife on the Galapagos Islands. Boobies, or more specifically, Blue-Footed Boobies, are a kind of bird that inhabit the islands. The creatures are famous for their aquamarine flippers.

A few years ago here at Northwestern there was a popular student blog called Overheard at NU penned by an alumna living in New York City. She started the blog her senior year during Finals Week. After graduation, she continued to accept submissions from current students to keep the blog alive. For a couple years she amused the student body with the ridiculous conversations going on around campus.

Now it seems the Web site has been abandoned -- the last post is from a long time ago, more specifically, October 2008. I'm sure the blogger who previously waded through piles of submissions from her alma mater has moved onto life in the real-world. But, as an experiment this week, I decided to try and listen up for what ridiculous things I overheard on campus.

In addition to feeling awkward for eavesdropping on people passing by me, or struggling to maintain my own conversation while mentally writing down the discussion at the table next to me; I had a really funny week. Below, I have compiled a list of my favorites for you to enjoy.

(In Library)

Girl #1: How do you spell Baroque?

Girl #2: B-A-R-O-K-E

Girl #1: Oh yeah, duh.

Freshman: I dunno dude, but she’s totally DTF.

Intoxicated girl, on cell-phone: Wait! Mom! Can you Mapquest my location and help me get back to my dorm? Where am I? I’m on a corner, Mom. I can see Chili’s. And trees.

Girl #1: I want Burger King.

Girl #2: I will never eat Burger King again.

(Later, same two girls in Burger King)

Girl #2: It’s like cocaine.

Boy #1: Meet me at the Rock after class, okay?

Boy #2: What’s the Rock?

Professor: I am so hungover.

T.A.: What?

Professor: I am hungover. What, aren’t you?

T.A.: (awkwardly laughs) Uh, no?

Professor: Ha. Loser.

As fun as it was to tune into all the ridiculous things people have been saying around me, I think I’ll try and stick to focusing on my own conversations. A lot of the things I heard reminded me of conversations that I might have with my own friends. I have come to the realization that out of context, a lot of the stuff I say would sound pretty dumb.

Let this serve as a warning to everyone. Be careful what you say, and think before you speak. You never know who could be listening in.

Weinberg junior Alana Buckbee can be reached at alanabuckbee2007@u.northwestern.edu.